Thursday, December 27, 2012

The Mayans Were Wrong!

Okay, so since the world didn't end on December 21 (that's the last time I trust the Mayans!), that means we have a little more time here on planet earth.

I realize I have not been blogging for a loooong time, so I am NOT going to tell you that I was secretly prepping for the end of the world (unless prepping for the end of the world requires frantically trying to meet deadlines while also procrasinating endlessly stalking ex-boyfriends on Facebook). Ahem. I have not been doing either one of those things. I have been very busy!

Since I last posted, I've finished my writing project with Francine Pascal (the update on Sweet Valley, first an e-serial and now in hardback... check it out The Sweet Life). I'm on to another project with more details to come!

And if you haven't read Tale of Two Proms, yet. Do!

I've also been keeping busy with 2nd Story, a storytellers group in Chicago. That picture is me talking about my ultimate Epic Fail: online dating. After getting divorced a few years ago, I was thrust suddenly back onto the dating scene. It was quite a culture shock.
Taken at Webster's Wine Bar by Michael Patterson.
I never thought I’d have an online dating story. You see, I married my college boyfriend, way back when Clinton was still in office. There was barely an Internet then, much less a But, much like M.C. Hammer pants, my marriage did not last. Stop: Divorce Time. Things had changed a lot since I’d last been single.

Back then: I had a relatively flat stomach. If I knew how awesome my stomach was at age 23, I would’ve worn bikinis to work. Dress code? Shove it, Human Resources. There’s an expiration date on these abs, and I have no time to lose. Fast forward 15 years.
Now: Two pregnancies have turned my stomach into flesh-colored Play-doh. My belly button is no longer a button at all. It looks like the mouth of a really depressed hand puppet.

Back then: I could stay out until two in the morning.
Now: I can barely stay awake until 9 p.m.

Back then: My ride was a sleek black coupe.
Now: When I rolled up on a date, it would be in a silver minivan. Oh, yeah.

Back then: I actually knew something about current events and news in general.
Now: I am far more likely to know the name of a supporting character on Dora the Explorer, than a Supreme Court Justice. These are just facts. Sad, sorry facts.

For my new year's resolution in 2013, I will try to remember to blog more. But, for more timely updates, do friend me on Facebook (Cara Lockwood) or follow me on Twitter (@caralockwood).