Writer's Panic

So, as many of you know, I'm working hard to finish up I Did (But I Wouldn't Now) the spin-off book to my first novel, I Do (But I Don't).

I'm in the final stages of revising my first draft, and this is normally when the panic starts to set in. Now, with writing, there are various stages of panic. There's Stage One ("Oh my god, I have to start writing" panic). Then, Stage Two ("Why did I ever agree to write this novel? I can't even spell my own name without spell check" panic). Stage Three ("I've finished a rough draft and it's as bad as I thought! All my friends and family are going to disown me"). Then there's Stage Four (Resignation: "I've only been pretending I can write. I'm going to take my advance and run off to Guatemala").

I'm currently in Stage Three. What makes this phase so terrifying is that I'm nearing the point when I'm going to actually have to let other people read the manuscript.

So far, the only eyes on the manuscript have been mine, and let's face it, I tend to have a close relationship with denial. Not to mention, after a few margaritas, everyone thinks they write like Hemmingway.

It's sort of like when you try to exercise at home. I used to try to do those Tae Bo DVDs, but the thing of it is, if you're alone in your living room you really don't have to try that hard. Billy Blanks won't know if I do 50 roundhouse kicks or just five.

That's how writing is. You do it alone for a long while, slacking off here and there, and then you realize you're about to release your work into the public domain. It's like going from DVD Tae Bo to teaching an aerobics class on live television in front of a million people. Then, you really start to regret reading People magazine while you should've been doing the stomach crunches.

And guys - don't forget - if you donate at least $25 to the Red Cross for the victims of Hurricane Katrina and send me your donation receipts at cara@caralockwood.com before the end of September, you could win a signed copy of "I Do (But I Don't)." Just email me your donation receipts at cara@caralockwood.com. I'll be picking winners on October 1.